Hello mentees. Thank you so much for being a member of our help each other community and committing to your own personal growth. Its great to see you taking responsibility for you. Which is key to being successful in any aspect of life. So good job. Keep doing it. Not everyone takes full responsibility for themselves. My name’s Mike Garska. The founder of FindAMentor – Fam as we like to call it. We built this site because we can help you find support and there are allot of people looking for it, just like you. Even if you don’t find a mentor here, our guidance will help you find one somewhere else. You might find a mentor on-line at a different site, listed in our resources. Do a mentor search here first though. In the meantime, I can mentor you through videos like this and through our emails and free training programs, that we offer from time to time. Now, Today I’m going to give you three tips to help you with being successful in any aspect of life. These are basics and you may have heard them before, ——lets see. Ill also give a couple tips how to get the most from your membership in our community. First, A little about me. I’ve been self employed for over 40 years now. My first venture was building a cellular phone business form the trunk of my car to three stores and 3 million in annual sales. We often had 2 of the top 5 performing stores in the country. I sold that business after 9!years, took a year off and travelled a bit. We took the kids out of school and went through Europe and Africa for a few months. Then I started consulting, training and coaching in leadership, communications and sales/profit growth. I’ve been specializing in helping family businesses for over 20 years now. So, ill share quick 10-15 minute mentor sessions like this one, that you may find helpful. Some concepts you’ll have already heard. Its still good to get reminders sometimes. so watch them and leave comments. Let me ask you, do you want to know what thought patterns are holding you back and which ones are propelling you forward. Do you want to know how to find the right thought and emotional processes for success inside you? Well your in the right place. Mentors can help you find and express them. So can we. Here’s Tip one of 3 for today: Make sure you use many mentors. And you likely are already without necessarily realizing it. Now, I want to expand your perspectives on mentoring and being a mentee, so, lets start that. I see mentoring as a natural process. As a child we might look to an older sibling, cousin or parent and we naturally learn from them and incorporate some of their personality traits into our own. They are our mentors, and we want to be like them in some way, big or small. So, as life evolves for each of us, Teachers, bosses and co-workers can become mentors. Who are some of the mentors you’ve looked up so far your in life, and why. Who has helped mold you into the person you are right now? And —What kind of traits do you want in your next mentor? Now consider this, Some mentors teach us what not to do. As I look back at my family mentors, I learned what to do and what not to do from all of them in some way. Their different actions and reactions to life, I both liked and didn’t like. I chose which traits, I wanted to incorporate into me and which ones I didn’t want. For example: Dad left mom for a much younger women after they had 5 kids. I was 7 when they split. I didn’t want to be like that. And the truth is I only saw my dad about once a year from that time on. So naturally my mom, uncles, my older siblings, and cousins became mentors, each in their own unique little way. My mom taught me the importance of acceptance of differences. She would invite almost anyone into our home for tea or celebrations like Christmas and Easter, whether they were Christian or not. Being understanding and accepting of diversity, has allowed me to grow a very large and interesting network of friends and colleagues, so I’m grateful to my mom for that. My mom and uncles also demonstrated the importance of strong worth ethics and the importance of having fun in life. Balance become important to me along with a strong work ethic. Work hard and play hard. One of my first summer jobs was at my uncle’s creamery, washing cream cans. I was 10 or 11. Another job I had at that young age was picking rocks in farm fields. And helping with fencing. Now, all, of my uncles were alcoholics. My dad was the only male of that generation on both sides of the family, that was not an alcoholic. So, I learned from watching all of them, that I could use substance responsibly, like my dad, and still work hard and party hard. Okay lets move on. At this point in life, you’ve chosen to guide your own learning by searching for a good mentor, or mentors. That’s why you joined here, right? Yes or yes? The first step to being better and growing is to know yourself, where you’re at right now — and where you want to be, or what you want to be. Know yourself and what got you here. What’s working. What isn’t? What do you need to know, or be like, to go to your next level? What does your next mentor need to know or be like? Think about and write it all down. Then, when you meet a mentor, you’ll know quickly if he or she is right for you. Okay tip 2. Jack Canfield says, Author of chicken soup for the soul series, which sold 100’s of millions of copies, says, “Take responsibility for your responses.” Take responsibility for every response you have. This is very important. Your reactions and responses to situations decide your future in so many ways. They affect every interaction –and relationship –you have with another person. Your responses dramatically affect the responses and reactions you get back. From mentors too. Our responses and reactions affect what level of success we reach in any aspect of life. Reactions and responses affect whether we get good service or bad service at a restaurant. Our automatic responses and reactions even affect our health, so keep taking responsibility for them. Now, find your mentor, so he or she can guide you on what to do or how to respond to circumstances and situations. Right. We want to control and regulate our responses, especially in difficult or sensitive situations. Right . Yes.
So, I’m going to suggest you Watch our “Two things you need to know that they never taught us in school” video, it’s about the Human Interaction Process (the HIP). It will help you understand yourself, and why you react and respond the way you do. It will help you have more understanding of others and why they respond the way they do. It will likely influence the way you respond to different situations. Watch and learn about your unique Human Interaction Process. It will help. I promise.
We always want to help you be better so also explore our tools and tips pages here at FAM in the top bar navigation menu. Explore the different types of mentoring. Maybe you want to get a business mentor or need help identifying a mentor. Use the verification forms and questionnaires. Use the mentor session forms too. They’re meant to help and guide you.
I actually suggest as a mentee, print and fill out the mentee questionnaire form for yourself. It will help you find the right mentors because, When you know precisely what you want, its quicker and easier to find it.
It can be like buying a car. Before I buy a car, I test drive a couple, and then I decide exactly what I want, make – model – year. and then I shop. I call a few dealers, I look at private sale, get a few prices. I get suppliers competing. I find the best value price.
If I don’t know the exact cart I want and I go to a dealer, the sales person is going to show me what he or she want to sell the most. He or she may talk into believing its exactly what you want when it might not be. its easier to get caught up in making an emotional bad decision if we’re not clear on what we want.
Using mentors is similar. Prepare. Know what you want in a mentor. Know the traits you’re looking for, the experience they need to have, so you can trust their guidance. Know what you want to learn and why and it will make it easier to decide who’s the right mentor for you as they show up in your life.
And remember, in the end, No one saves themselves. We save each other. We need each other. We are social creatures. When we make the decision to be better, we need support to get better. Its why you’re here and joined our community. You’re looking for support. Yes or yes? So, start searching and learning. Read and watch our blogs and videos. Consider them mentor sessions with me. Explore the different ways to get mentored in the tools and tips.
I advise having at least 4 mentors in every important aspect of life so you can call them and get different perspectives when challenges come up. When you need a quick flash mentoring session, like when you’re facing an immediate challenge and need some advice pronto. Its good you have a few mentors in your network. Don’t pigeonhole your mentoring options.
When I operated my Cell phone business, I had 4 business mentors. One was my accountant. Another owned a welding supply company. Another ran a large paper business. Another was a VP with a cellular network.
I also took coaching programs, went to seminars, sent my staff to seminars and training sessions, and did what I needed to so I could learn to be a good business owner, and so my employee group was better than the competitors. Don’t stop learning. The more perspectives you have, the more choices and options you will see. It all helps us make wiser decisions.
Also, it’s a really good idea to use masterminding groups of 4 or 5 people that have the same goals. They can all be mentees, and it will still work if you’re all active in the field of interest.
You can learn a lot from each others’ mistakes and wins if you meet regularly and talk about things in the right way. Learning curves typically go up very dramatically when we mastermind with 4 or 5 people vs. just two. In the mastermind format, one mentor can guide many and everyone learns much quicker.
Use our group formats wisely. Set up private- 2 person groups – for you and a mentor only in your category of choice. And set up secondary groups that allow more than two members, Having 1 or 2 mentors leading a few mentees is a really good idea too. I’ve witnessed learning curves increase dramatically in groups of 4 or 5. Create your group and invite both mentors and mentees.
Limit the size though. Too big of a group can be difficult to manage —it depends. Don’t expect your mentor to be a miracle worker. They are there to guide you only. If you don’t like what they say, see what others mentors say.
If they all say something you don’t like, then suck it up. Don’t get frustrated or discouraged if things take awhile to get going for you. Sometimes we have to do things we’re don’t really like to, in order to succeed. The number rule for success in any life endeavor, is to go another mile. Never give up. Do whatever it takes.
Okay, so one more tip from me as a mentor today. Tip 3. It’s Based on this quote from Warren Buffett; If you want to be worth 50%^ more than you are right now, Hone your communications skills.”
So, I’ve been teaching communications courses for over 20 years. I’ve studied it closely and expanded my knowledge over that period of time. In my consulting career, we found that the number one thing that employees complain about is weak communications and information flow. Poor communicating. 100 % of the employee surveys conducted by our company showed this as the number one concern. Communication at times is a problem for almost everyone.
So we offer our on-line CONTACT 20-20 course a very special price for FAM members and we have a free introductory training. Check it out. [link to free communications training blog] I know you’ll hear things you haven’t before. Your communication knowledge and ability will expand. I also want you to know that we appreciate you. Thank you for being here and taking responsibility for you. And your growth and the growth of your value to society and friends. Sign up for our daily inspirational email too. We send quotes out every day to keep you inspired and we often will include a training option you can subscribe to. Thanks for being a member of FAM and for watching this video Go have an awesome day. Cheers. See you next time. Watch free mentoring session; The two most important things I learned that they don’t teach us in school. Watch the free communications training mentor session now.
